Satire

    Why am I here?  This makes no sense. It is impossible and always will be.  Nope, you're wrong.  Idiot.
   "And then he had risen!"  Really, just like in those comic books I read as a child.  Iron Man crushed by the rubble comes out with half the mask cut out with sparks flying from the exposed wires.  Great, it's Easter, this means I'm here even longer.  Just what i wanted.  Hey Jesus, whoop me up some wine from this water bottle, make me a happy man.
   "Do you believe this crap?"
   "Of coarse I believe these beautiful morals".  This moral? Does she know what they did to those kids when i was in school.  Yet she trusts our child with them every Sunday night to get enlightened.  Who does she think she is? My children are at risk, they could be scared.  Ooooh let's kneel now that's just great.
   "And he took the bread..."  Let me break it over your head.  I have to eat this?  Where have his hands been?  Ugh.  Now the wine.  Great, he's gonna get wated up there.  Stumble down the stairs. "Which one of you peseants want some fricken' bread."  That would make this better.
  "And drink of it,"  I'll drink of it, alright.  Me and you father let's have a fun time.  Then it will seriously be a happy hour.  Now we're getting up great.  Bread is stale.  That's not even whine what the hell.
   "Love and serve the Lord."
   "Let's go!"  Oooh dammit.  I said that way too loud.  "What are you all looking at? We're all thinking the same thing.  Look at him he's about to sprint out here.  Why are you even here?  You looked bored outta your mind.  This is fricken' nuts.  Let's all go here even when we know we'll be bored.  Thank you-umm gotta go cook the ham good seeing you.